Saturday, March 17, 2007

Groups, Gatherings and Gangs

Early this morning I could hear a rooster crowing from across the highway. Not long after I heard the racket of the crows in the woods. I love to hear a rooster, though I'm not especially fond of them as I have been on the wrong end of their "cockiness" more times than I care to remember. This caused me to wonder "if a rooster crows, why doesn't a crow crow?" (Deep thoughts here..hold, they get deeper.) These ponderings led me to consider the names they assign to groups of animals. With the help of my computer, I present you with some of my favorites.

a battery of barracudas
an obstinacy of buffalo
a pounce of cats
a coalition of cheetahs
a flamboyance of flamingoes
a trip of goats
a bloat of hippopotami
a lamentation of swans
a gulp of swallows
an exaltation of larks
an ambush of tigers
a bouquet of pheasants
a troubling of goldfish (is this possible?)

These wonderful descriptions led me to name a few groups of things that exist in my house.

a lamentation of unfinished projects
an ambush of dog hair
a battery of spiders
a trip of junk piles
a bloat of leftovers
an obstinacy of lost items
a pounce of laundry
a flamboyance of dirty windows
a gulp of clogged drains
a coalition of mismatched knitting needles
a bouquet of cobwebs

All are true, except the gulp of clogged drains. I just couldn't resist. I didn't use an "exaltation" as I leave that one to you. An exaltation that she is finally through with her disjointed ramblings. I know you are asking, "Does her elevator go to the top floor?" "Knock, knock, is there anyone at home?" "Should I call the men with the restraining jackets?"

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