Thursday, July 26, 2007

Post Op Report

You may be interested in the fate of Coats and Clark All Purpose, Dual Duty Art.210 XC 161. Surgery was performed at 10:15 a.m. PST. The patient has survived, although she is still in recovery. No anesthetic was administered (note vituperative attitude of Surgeon) and, other than a hand washing, no antibiotics were employed. The Surgeon did note a bit of discomfort on the part of the patient when the initial cut was made, also when sanding devices were utilized, but this is not the Good Samaritan of Sewing Hospital, nor is it Our Lady of Perpetual Concern when it comes to recalcitrant, mean spirited spools. You reap what you sew here, and since the Surgeon in charge could not sew, a large reap (weep for her if you wish) was called for. Coats and Clark is now in ICU (oh, look, someone sent her flowers!) and it is hoped that her time there will be spent in quiet contemplation and in a determined state of atonement.
Note to any reader: Did you realize that emery boards come with a warning label.."Keep Out of Reach of Children". Now honestly, I raised two children and never felt the need to keep my emery boards locked away in a cupboard. Call me irresponsible, call me unfit, call Children's Services...I ask, what is it about an emery board that posts a problem? I did try to cut myself with one, slit my throat, injure the dogs, but nothing happened. Perhaps if I take two out into the sunshine and rub them together I'll be able to start a fire.



marylou said...

Hiya E..oops, I mean Dr. Ellen:)
If Dual Duty Art.210 x C 161 does not make it thru ICU can I have her flowers?? Can I, huh..huh..huh?? Maybe she has a IRA or some stocks & bonds floating around somewhere?? Hey, a girl has to look out for herself nowadays:)
Wishing you a wonderful coming week, have fun and do lots of 3 year old amazing last thought...PLEASE let the little child have ONE piece of candy from Auntie Marylou:)
Hug Life
Love ya, Marylou

Marti said...

I think perhaps it just tastes really awful. The emery board that is. You might be able to poke yer eye out with it too. If you really worked at it.
Love the band-aid in the photo too!

Unknown said...

Hi Ellen, It sure sounds like you've been having a frustrating time, I love the picture though. Hopefully your next project will go a bit smoother.

Thanks for your comment on my sketchbook cover, maybe I will make a tutorial for it...that's if I can remember all the measurements!

Amy said...

I prefer buying the metal emery boards (or nail files) with the sharp tip..they can really do a lot of damage...ICU? I thought your thread went from "time out" to solitary confinement:)

Monica said...

I hope C&C behave next time! I didn't know emery boards comes with a warning...I'll better go take a look in my girls 'manicure' bag! Seems like nowadays we have to keep almost everything away from the little ones. How can they have fun then!! :)

marylou said...

Girlfriend:) are back!! I truly missed my mentor, my buffoonery has been on hiatus:( Now that you have returned I shall be inspired to "get in trouble":)
Hugs, Marylou
ps..Hope that child had some candy:)

fleur_delicious said...

hmmm...emery boards...emery boards. Perhaps if one tries VERY hard, one could choke on an emery board?

thanks for your sweet comment on my lunch! I do plan - one of these days - to Boston just for the express purpose of going to Hammersley's bistro and leaving him a note! That man's cookbook is pure gold, I tell you.

Rhonda the Stitchingnut said...

Thanks for the compliment on my tea cozy. I decided to stop by and oh my, I didn't expect to see surgery ... even on a spool of thread, LOL. I didn't even know they had wooden spools around anymore... or even Coats & Clark. Well I have a couple hanging on my wall but not fully pregnant ones. Hope the recovery went well. ;-)